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Top 7 Tactics to Flirt with Flair
By Joseph R. Plazo
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Wondering how to close that cavernous chasm between you and the lovely vision that just crossed your path? You don't need a Ph.D in rocket science to master the fine art of flirting!
Let's hunker down to business:
- Generous Smiling. You must smile. How does your smile look? It may be invisible or threatening. You probably think you smile now, but you're actually grimacing-- and scaring away your prospect. Practice your smile in the mirror, your smile will probably have to be brighter than you are accustomed to.
- Magnetic eye contact. While you are conversing with her, you must have have eye contact 80% of the time. Unwavering eye contact creates primal tensions between individuals and gets the chemistry surging. Eyes are more than the windows to the soul... their are the portals to the heart. Observe how lovers gaze for hours on end? Extending the amount eye contact makes an acquaintance feel that both of you are already in a deep state of attraction and it geometrically increases rapport. Next time, someone snares your fancy, gaze at her her directly, "just a tad too long" till she notices and averts her gaze.
One more thing. Most people quickly avert their gaze when the object of their fancy looks back at them. Leil Lowndes teaches that by pretending that you were trapped in a furtive glance spikes the romantic tension. If you want to let that person know you are *interested* when she catches you looking, smile flirtatiously, hold eye contact a tad longer, then look down and away.
- Nodding. A barely perceptible nod to someone who espied you looking, along with a smile, is a non-intrusive, very enticing way to say "hello." Nod whenever someone notices you. Nod when someone is talking, so as to signify agreement.
- Laughing at the most unlaughable jokes. If she says something she thinks is funny give a sincere laugh as a way of sharing a little rapport. Behave as thoughf the two of you are in on some private joke. Stony faced silence kills rapport.
- Asking Open Ended Questions. A universal tactic get the love of your heart interested in you is by asking her to share more of herself. Begin most of your questions with "How" and "What" questions. This allows your prospect to search herself for meaningful answers and deliver paragraphs of replies. The more she talks, the better, because she will find you a dazzling conversationalist. Listen 70% of the time and speak 30% of the time. Ensure that you show understanding with most of her statements by saying, "I understand"... "I see...", "That must have been great...",
- Use *Magic Openers* that entice the female to initiate the conversation themselves. This saves you the trouble of searching for a conversational topic! Many lesser sophisticated males stammer and haw in front of someone they find impressive. By reducing yourself to an unintelligible hulk, you lose your mystique and self-respect. Avert this fatal mistake and let the women start talking! Favorite opening gambits amongst NLPers and psychologists include "Have you ever...", "What's it like to..." " what's the story behind that?" You can ask "what's the story behind that?" The more they open up, the better they feel about the budding relationship.
- Kinesthetics and Subtle Touching. Touching can work miracles and boost the sensual chemistry. Unfortunately, many unskilled flirtation artists know little about this art. Touching can be as subtle as fleetingly placing your hand on her hand for a moment, or supporting her waist for as you walk to a table to sit down. You can brush away imaginary lint from her sleeve... the variations are boundless. Just do this a couple of times on the first flirting interaction--if she pulls away, don't do it again. Touching occurs between individuals that have developed close relationships. Observe that close friends, lovers and relatives engage in non-intrusive touching which are very welcome. The lack of touching indicates that there is an emotional barrier. By touching a new acquaintance, you rapidly transform the relationship from "acquaintance level" to "Friend level"
Dont' forget the Principle of Scarcity. Stop when you're ahead, as the gamblers say. David Copeland asserts that flirting should be fun, and you should leave the flirting interaction feeling victorious. Desperate men often end an initial encounter feeling rejected or lost because they don't stop flirting until it stops being fun. At the high point of the new encounter, excuse yourself and leave. This will make your prospect yearn to see you again... and make you appear a more valuable person.
Exceed International is more than a global organization. We are a company connecting with customers every day. Since our launching, we've grown to offer our clients self-development and behavioral re-engineering consultancy... all to promulgate essential skills for your success!
Our Mission: Exceed International empowers people -- your success is our driving force. We develop capabilities that give you the edge to succeed in all human interactions.
Our Vision: We strive to provide a superior source of personality development technologies. With each client, we seek to be a trusted mentor and to establish satisfying, personalized associations.
Core Competencies: Our field of specialization encompasses the realm of all human interaction. Our pool of knowledge includes: negotiation, scientific persuasion, NLP tactics (neurolinguistic programming) , dispute management, assertiveness training, debate, public speaking, image projection, and negotiation skills.
Founder: Exceed International was founded on February 1, 1998 by Joseph R. Plazo, MBA, C|EA.
Joseph had been directing multiple enterprises since he became financially independent at 22. Trained in Neurolinguistic Programming, persuasion sciences and business process re-engineering, he's authored several books and conducted online and classroom workshops.
Today he runs the gauntlet of his doctoral studies while continuously connecting with men and women all over the world to spread the revolutionary gospel of savvy semantics and behavioral change technologies. His rallying cry is Make Life Magic!
Visit us now at www.XtremeMind.com
Article Submitted On: August 30, 2004